I dropped out of social media for a while. Do I still exist?
It is a strange illusion. Did I really think I could exist by posting my thoughts and pictures on line?
Sometimes things happen in life that challenge my sense of self and those old questions nag me; Who am I? Do I truly exist? Do I truly belong?
Since I was a child fly fishing has helped me with these existential concerns. Even now when some of the people I loved are no longer here, and I feel lost, returning to the river can ease my pain helping me regain who I am.
As the poet Rilke says, "And if the earthly no longer knows your name, whisper to the silent earth: I'm flowing. To the flashing water say: I am."
I stand in the river casting in the flowing, flashing river and I remember him.
I whisper, I still am. I still exist.
